What Is FetLife? A Guide to the Kink Community’s Most Iconic Platform

FetLife is often described as “Facebook for kink,” but that hardly captures the depth and texture of the platform. Launched in 2008, FetLife has become one of the most influential online gathering spaces for people interested in BDSM, fetish play, power exchange, ethical non-monogamy, and alternative sexuality. For many kinksters, it’s the first digital doorway into a world where their desires aren’t just tolerated—they’re understood.

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Gatekeeping in BDSM: How It Happens, Why It Hurts, and How We Build Better Communities

BDSM communities are built on consent, education, personal empowerment, and mutual respect. Yet even in spaces meant to be open and affirming, gatekeeping sometimes appears.
Gatekeeping—when individuals or groups attempt to control who is “allowed” to participate, how they must participate, or what “real” kink looks like—can quietly undermine the very foundations that BDSM depends on.

This article explores what gatekeeping is, why it happens, the harm it causes, and how we can collectively create more inclusive, safer kink communities.

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Understanding the “Bitch Suit” in BDSM: Purpose, Psychology, and Play

In the diverse world of BDSM, certain forms of roleplay and power exchange push deeply into the territory of objectification, transformation, and psychological intensity. Among them is the bitch suit—a full-body encasement and roleplay scenario designed to create a complete shift in identity, agency, and presentation. For those who enjoy pet play, humiliation dynamics, or extreme bondage, the bitch suit is an advanced, immersive tool that demands clear communication and rigorous consent.

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Puppy Play in BDSM: Connection, Playfulness, and Power Dynamics

Puppy play is one of the most joyful, expressive, and emotionally rich forms of BDSM roleplay. Rooted in imagination, instinct, and freedom from human expectations, it offers a unique blend of intimacy, power exchange, and playful exploration. Whether practiced lightly for fun or deeply as part of a 24/7 dynamic, puppy play invites participants to step into a world where communication, obedience, and trust take center stage.

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What Is the Reverse Prayer Tie?

In a Reverse Prayer Tie:

  • The hands are brought behind the back.
  • The palms are pressed together, fingers pointing upwards, mimicking the posture of prayer but in a reversed, submissive orientation.
  • The tie can include additional wrapping around the wrists, forearms, or upper arms for stability, as well as integration with chest or torso harnesses.

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What Is the Nina Russ Waist Harness?

The Nina Russ Waist Harness is a torso and waist-focused bondage tie that wraps around the midsection, ribs, and lower torso, creating a secure yet visually elegant structure. Unlike some full-body harnesses, this tie emphasizes the waist, back, and torso contours, allowing for both mobility and restraint.

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The Shibari Tengu Tie: Art, Sensation, and Restraint

The Tengu tie is a visually striking and versatile rope bondage tie in Shibari, prized for its aesthetic elegance, functional restraint, and erotic appeal. Named after the legendary Tengu creatures of Japanese folklore—often depicted as agile, powerful, and mysterious—the tie embodies both strength and beauty, making it a favorite in both erotic and artistic rope scenes.

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The Agura Tie: A Classic Seated Shibari Harness

The Agura tie is a traditional Shibari harness designed for a seated position, drawing its name from the Japanese word “agura,” which refers to sitting cross-legged. This tie combines aesthetic appeal, comfort, and functional restraint, making it a popular choice for both beginners and advanced rope enthusiasts.

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Play Piercing in BDSM: Sensation, Ritual, and Safety

Play piercing is a form of consensual needle-based sensation play within the BDSM community. Unlike traditional body piercings, which are permanent and decorative, play piercing is temporary, scene-focused, and designed to explore sensation, trust, and erotic intensity. For many practitioners, it’s both a physical and psychological experience, combining elements of ritual, aesthetic appeal, and controlled pain.

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