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The Double Column Tie: Connecting with Control and Care

The Double Column Tie is one of the most versatile and widely used techniques in Shibari. Where the single column tie secures one limb, the double column tie connects two columns together—most commonly wrists to wrists, ankles to ankles, or a wrist to a thigh. Simple in concept yet rich in application, this tie is a foundational skill every rope practitioner should master.

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The Single Column Tie: The Foundation of Shibari

The Single Column Tie is often the very first knot taught in Shibari—and for good reason. Simple, versatile, and incredibly important, this tie forms the backbone of countless rope patterns, harnesses, and artistic expressions. Mastering it builds not just technical skill, but confidence, communication, and trust between partners.

What Is a Single Column Tie?

A single column tie is used to secure one “column”—typically a wrist, ankle, thigh, or upper arm. The “column” refers to any cylindrical body part that rope can wrap around safely.

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Neurodivergence and BDSM: Clarity, Consent, and Authentic Connection

Being neurodivergent—whether autistic, ADHD, or otherwise outside neurotypical norms—can shape how a person experiences communication, sensation, and intimacy. For some neurodivergent people, BDSM offers a framework that feels more accessible and affirming than conventional relationship dynamics.

At its core, BDSM prioritizes clear communication, explicit consent, and negotiated boundaries. Desires, limits, roles, and expectations are discussed openly rather than implied. This transparency can reduce social ambiguity and anxiety, allowing neurodivergent individuals to engage on their own terms.

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Shibari and Autism: Structure, Sensation, and Intentional Connection

Shibari, the Japanese art of rope bondage, is often described as a practice rooted in intention, communication, and trust. For some autistic and neurodivergent individuals, these same qualities can make Shibari not only accessible, but deeply meaningful. While autism and Shibari are not inherently connected, their overlap highlights the importance of consent, clarity, and self-directed experience in intimacy.

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Autism and BDSM: Consent, Communication, and Connection

Autism and BDSM may seem unrelated at first glance, but for many autistic people, kink—and BDSM in particular—can offer a deeply affirming way to connect, communicate, and experience intimacy. Like all identities and interests, autism exists on a wide spectrum, and there is no single way autistic people experience relationships or sexuality. What does consistently matter is consent, clarity, and respect.

Understanding Autism in Adult Relationships

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) affects how people process sensory input, communicate, and navigate social interaction. Autistic adults may experience:

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Fetlife – “Facebook for kink”

FetLife is a social networking platform designed specifically for people interested in BDSM, kink, fetish, and alternative sexuality communities. It’s often described as “Facebook for kink”—but that comparison only goes so far.

Here’s a clear, honest breakdown.


What FetLife Is

FetLife is a community-driven social site, founded in 2008, where users can:

  • Create profiles centered around interests, roles, and kinks
  • Join groups focused on specific fetishes, identities, or locations
  • Attend and organize events like munches, workshops, rope jams, and play parties
  • Read and write long-form posts, essays, and discussions
  • Connect with others for learning, friendship, or consensual play

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Shibari in Ontario: The Art of Rope, Connection, and Community

Shibari — sometimes called Japanese rope bondage or Kinbaku — is an expressive art form that blends aesthetics, trust, touch, and technique. What began centuries ago in Japan as a method of restraint has evolved into a rich creative practice shared by enthusiasts across the world — including right here in Ontario, Canada.

A Growing Scene in Ontario

Ontario has developed a vibrant Shibari community, with classes, social events, rope jams, and experienced practitioners available across the province.

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shibari vs hojojutsu

Shibari (緊縛)

Meaning: “To tie” or “to bind”
Modern use: Erotic rope art & consensual bondage

Key characteristics

  • Purpose: Aesthetic, emotional, erotic, and artistic connection
  • Context: BDSM, performance art, photography, intimacy
  • Focus:
    • Beauty of rope patterns
    • Sensation and vulnerability
    • Power exchange (consensual)
  • Techniques: Often decorative, symmetrical, and body-accentuating
  • Consent: Explicit, negotiated, and central

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